I must confess. I am not in the mood to blog. I haven't been for some time and I may never be again. My life is starting over with new chapters and new time restrictions. Blogging for me takes time.

It's not that I don't like to blog. I do. I really do. I have made so many friends here that I just love to pieces and I never want to lose contact with them. But, I just can't blog.

Three weeks ago my Daddy died in an accident. He was almost 87 years old.

If you know me or if you don't and just read this blog then you know that my Mother and Daddy are incredible people. We are a close knit family. They were the rocks of our family. Our big family. Our amazing family. They shared a life together for 67 years. And for 57 of those years I worried about what would happen to my life someday when one of parents passed away. Now, I know. We are grief stricken for sure. We are stunned. But mostly we are just broken and feel so incomplete. We have physical pain from his absence.

For Daddy's sake we are happy. He is home. For our sake, we are sad. We are here. His car is still in that garage. His clothes are still in the closet. His Old Spice after shave sits by his toothbrush on the sink. The shoes he wore that last day are at the foot of my bed.

I wanted you to know. I wanted you to know why I am not here. My heart is just not in it right now. I'd love to tell you about my beautiful new granddaughter that was born 2 weeks ago. Oh she helped my heart so much. I could tell you that I am tired but I am feeling great. Did you know that I am going to be a grandmother again in February? That makes me very happy. Or, you might like to know that my children are all healthy and leading productive lives full of joy. I could tell you that I am abundantly blessed because I am. I know I am and I am so grateful.

But, I just don't want to talk right now. Because of my Daddy. He died 3 weeks ago and my heart will never be the same.

I've had several ask me in person, via email, and comments if I was ever going to blog again. I really had some hesitation because frankly my life is crazy. I feel like the things that I am dealing with on a personal level can't possibly be of interest to anyone else. Sometimes I even feel whiny and I don't want that.

Then on another level I have missed the contact. I was so very grateful last month when I know so many of you were on your knees praying for my mom and dad. You were praying prayers when I couldn't even find the words to start. I was literally washed out. I couldn't even put together a complete thought much less a complete sentence! Whatever lesson this has prepared me for I feel stronger. So. Thanks for caring if I update or not!

Mom is better. She is gaining strength everyday. She feels like it is slow and rightly so. But, I see the progress from different eyes. She has come so far! On her 85th birthday she endured a major major surgery and then the next week another one and then the next week another hospitalization via an ambulance ride. My sisters and I were literally running in every direction to make sure we had mother settled and Daddy at peace with how things were going. Let me tell you that it was not nor is it yet an easy job. But, we are getting there. We are having ups and downs but every moment God is continuing to guide us down the 'road'.

The family is all fine. Since I posted last we have celebrated Avery's 2nd birthday and Macy's 7th birthday. We are anxiously awaiting Jaxon's new sister Maddux to be born a few days before Jaxon's 2nd birthday in July. Camp Neena lifetime membership roster will be boosted to 5. That is a full week a piece! Or more is fine with me.

Gordon took a lateral tranfer to another LCRA facility last month. It was a great move for him personally. It is a shorter commute and is a much better working environment. It was not a raise but we are thankful for the "promotion" and the company's faith in his experience for the last 25 or so years. When this position became available we were so hopeful but also realistic that he would be the oldest candidate amidst a group of fresh out of college boys. But, experience reigned and the fact that he still has valuable lessons he can "teach" that younger generation to take over were rewarded.

I have 2 more BOOKWORM library Wednesdays. Truthfully? I am totally burned out. If it weren't for Tawana and all her hard work keeping it and me going I would have already thrown my hands up. We both have decided that this will be our last year. We loved it and have enjoyed the planning and the children but......she has 2 new granddaughters that she plans to visit alot and I am hoping that I can visit mine more too. Please feel free to slap me if I ever volunteer for anything again. Slap me hard.

For now, I think that about covers it. Stay tuned. There is never a dull or slow minute around here.

Just a quick note to let you know that things remain the same with mother. We are basically waiting on Tuesday. This will be the day of the open heart surgery to repair her right mitral valve. Which, excuse my language, has been regurgitating. That was straight from the diagnosis. She seems to getting a little more anxious and restless everyday while waiting. And understandably so. More pitiful still is to watch my daddy watch my momma. He wants to make it all go away for her. He wants to take her home. Tonight, we sisters, left them alone at the hospital to spend the night. We told them it was the honeymoon suite. And then I found the nearest restroom and had a meltdown. It was much needed so please don't think I want pity. It was a cleansing cry and I don't have to do those often. But sometimes nothing else will work. All we basically know factually is that open heart surgery will be performed on Tuesday to fix this problem. So, updates may be few and far between after this post. I'll be facebooking reports for those who have facebook. Just know that your prayers, those of you who know me and those of you who don't, are very much loved and appreciated by my family.

See that beautiful smile? That is my mother. That smile is what holds our family together. That and the humongous, loving, generous, giving, humble-spirited, caring, happy, free spirited, pleasant, positive, "never says a bad word about anything or anybody", heart that beats inside her. She is our rock. That man? My daddy absolutely adores her. I could tell you that he tells her everyday at least 100 times that he loves her. I could tell you that he leaves a quarter on her nightstand every night for her hard work. I could tell you that instead of a chocolate on her pillow, she gets a Hall's cough drop. Those are all true statements and a few of the ways, in his witty way, that he conveys his love for his bride of 67 years.

But, right now, today we find out that her physical heart is not working too well. Some of the tests that were run over the weekend showed that sometime in the past few months/weeks/days she has suffered a rather significant heart attack. We sort of have an idea now that are looking back as to when it happened but can't be sure. We just know that it happened. The plan for now is to proceed with a cardiac catherization to strengthen any areas that were not affected by the event. In other words, if there are any blockages they will stent them and if there are any other areas that can be seen that need repairs they will do that. But, basically what has been damaged is damaged. After that procedure, she will participate in a cardiac rehab program to build up her heart muscles.

So, please pray for her as we prepare for Thursday's surgery. Family is coming in to be with each other. Everyone, I mean everyone, loves this woman. I feel certain that we will receive our mother's heart repaired and healthy. In Daddy's words to the dr. , "She needs to get back to her mowing obligations!" And she has never mowed a day in her life.

I changed my mind. I did have something to say after all.

I go into the CITY tomorrow for my 6 months nuclear cardio study, which was moved up a couple of months, so more like 3 months. Prayers are coveted. Thank you very much.

Then after that 3 hour ordeal I am headed for a much needed girls night out. Two of my friends, from SHS days, and I are headed out to Nancy's weekend home on the lake. A little shopping, dinner out, alot of laughing and relaxing on the deck are just what I need.

Not to mention that shopping sacks make me happy. Very happy.

Today? Believe it or not. "Not" for those who know me.
I have nothing to say.

Not a grandchild. At least of mine. Can you say "U.G.L.Y. you ain't got no alibi" ?

Now, this is beautiful. Yes, this is mine.

Beautiful too. But, some serious bed head.

A little cousin love.

Spring break used to thrill me. Now, everyday is spring break and my "kids" have to go school. Something is wrong with this! So, I taught my innocent babes how to play hooky yesterday.

I got to Houston in time on Monday night to watch Rooster as the starting pitcher for the Twins. He pitched his way to a team victory.











Obviously, this gal has some serious dry skin issues.

Yes, sireeee. I took my babies to the zoo.

A little spring grooming going

on here! Just be glad you

don't have to eat your

"mates" mites.

Tiny Princess didn't like this exhibit and wanted to move on to the crocodillios.

Avery doing a little "fish watching" while waiting for chicken strips and fries.

OH puhhhhhleeeezzz. Get this girl a pedicure.

My favorite eerie scene. The jelly fish under black light.

I will never go past the ankles at the beach again. EVER.

My next trip back will be to watch this prima ballerina perform. It's worth all 4 hours sitting in the auditorium to watch the 3 minute dance. But, this year as a special treat, her mommy, along with 40 other mommies will be tapping together in a dance. Yes, my 36 year old baby bought some tap shoes. This girl can move.

PS...I HATE BLOGGER TONIGHT.

A post of extreme contentment and rest. I am headed off to bed after a wonderful day. We slept in and then stayed in until after lunch. Then decided it was time to run to Walmart. We chased around in there picking up odds and ends.. Came home and grilled burgers outside. Nana and Poppi joined us. Now it's time for bed because we lose an hour of sleep.....THANKS DST. I'll pay for that for the next month! Tomorrow is a roast lunch with all the trimmings. A lazy afternoon after that.

Jaxon is learning her way around Neena's and we are loving having her, She is one of those amazing children that is just so much fun to be with me. Monday we are headed to Houston to watch cousins take swimming lessons, tap dance and play baseball. Can NOT wait.

Avery has been gone for just 24 hours and I'm already lonesome. But, as usual, things are picking up around here. The D bunch is on their way tomorrow to spend Spring Break! Then, "insert excited face", JD and Jaxon are going to stay for a few weeks. I have not seen them since Christmas. TOO LONG. I get to love on them exclusively. I get to pat JD's sweet belly and talk to my newest granddaughter. She can hear me now or so the Baby experts say. She will know my voice before July 3rd! We hope to spend the next few weeks doing all kinds of fun things. That will def include a trip to H town to visit all the cousins. We hope to see Riley and Brooks, and of course their mommy and daddy. Cade???? Wouldn't that be exciting timing! ( OK, Aunt Kellianne & Aunt Danni...you too, I'll share!) We hope to catch Reid's ballgames and some of Macy's adventures. Of course, cousin Avery will be along for the ride too when we go.

You know how happy Neena is when all her "chicks" are in the nest. WAY WAY WAY happy!

This blog world just gets smaller. I have asked you before to pray for friends I have never met, Jenny and Brad Wims and their children. Brad has been battling cancer for 2 years now. And man was he in a battle. His little bit of a wife never left his side while still comforting their children, parents, families and the expansive blog world that she kept posted.

Brad passed away yesterday. He had known that this time was coming. You should not have die when you are just starting your life. His Christian example was evident to all....his church family rallied around him continously. His friends played cards and games with him until the end. Their home ( and that is what it is ) was filled with family and friends for months as they embraced the ending of Brad's life. They literally surrounded him.

You can link off the side of my blog to Faith, Family and Friendships and read about this exceptional family.

His little boy, Zeke, today said he thinks his Daddy is running and breathing in Heaven. I think so too, Zeke. I think so too.

Just an update to let everyone know that the wildfires are settling down in our area. If the winds will cease we should be able to hear they are contained soon. With our EXTREME drought conditions this scene has been a worry to all for sometime. Yesterdays unusually high winds made it all worse....much worse. Law enforcement patrolled door to door checking on citizens for miles. They came through our driveway too. Although we were advised to be on stand by for a probable mandatory evacuation of our home last night, we were able to stay home. We sat outside until dark watching the helicopters loaded with water going back and forth to the scenes. I say scenes because it was miles and miles long and deep through the woods and home areas. At last count close to 30 homes have been lost and countless acres of farmland, miles alongside our State Park ( unknown how the park was affected ) and unknown wildlife and livestock. Our church, along with other churches in town, and the City Recreational center are hosting families who are displaced from their homes. We had good friends who lost their homes and everything. As I sat out in the yard last night listening to sirens, ambulances, and helicopters I thought about seriously what I would grab if I had to leave. I started out with a very long list.....yes almost everything, including Christmas ornaments but when it all came down to it? I just would have gotton my purse and left. That's it. There is not one thing that I place that much value into and if you know me and how much I love my home and my pretties, then you know that's something for me. Seriously. The panic around here yesterday just made me imagine what the war torn areas of our world that deal with panic and crisis on a daily/minute by minute basis and how brave our soldiers ( and firefighters ) are. I still hear all the choppers in the distance as I type but I am safe and sound. And blessed. This world is not my home anyway.

Here is a blurb off the Austin news web:
Highway 71 is open after a fire consumed more than 650 acres in Bastrop County and destroyed homes and businesses.

Crews are still fighting hot spots near Highway 71 between Bastrop and Smithville. But firefighters are estimating only 50 percent of the fire is contained.

At least 23 homes and structures were burned to the ground. Plus three businesses and four vehicles were also destroyed.

The wildfire charred 650 acres, and 150 homes had to be evacuated.

The fire started at about 12:30 Saturday afternoon after strong winds knocked down power lines.

Law enforcement shut down Highway 71 at Mcallister and turned motorists around.

Crews fought the blaze from the air and the ground, and say drought conditions and high winds made their job that much more difficult.

Bastrop County Judge Ronnie McDonald declared a disaster for Bastrop County. That allows the county to receive federal aid to fight the fire.

One fire fighter was treated for smoke inhilation. No other injuries have been reported.

 
 

This picture sequence cracks me up. Avery is giving Jaxon a coloring lesson. Notice her "blurry" head while she gives her speech. That is a "hold your color this way...... yada yada yada".

Notice Jaxon's face. She already knew all that.

The last several years that I have been blogging have flown by. I started as a way to stay in contact with my children, nieces/nephews, sisters, cousins, etc. Just sort of a newsletter. None of my friends blogged and I surely wasn't out to win any awards. I just truly liked to keep in touch with everyone so easily. Along the way, I started reading other blogs. Don't ask me how I ended up finding some of the ones I did. I really don't have a clue. All of a sudden there was a little group of us that read each other's news everyday and left encouraging or humorous comments. Friendships were made without ever a handshake or hug. Dear friendships. Ironically, or God driven as I like to think, we all were similiar in age ( no offense to you younger ones ), we all had similiar upbringings, we all were socially in the same type of life situations, but most importantly and amazing is that we all shared the exact same faith. We all "hailed" from the same type of pews, so to speak. Each and everyone of them has been a daily encouragement to me for years now. We pray for each other and share lots of things on here and by emails. We've all had trials and we've all had happy things happen to us during our past years as friends.

Right now, one of "us" is going through a health scare. Kelley is waiting on some lab work to confirm some type of diagnosis for her recent sicknesses. We are all praying that is going to be a simple fix. That she'll be as good as new and back to serving God in her bubbly way. Also, heavy on my heart is a young guy named Brad. He is not one of this group that I speak of but I have been following his story for a year now. He is also a servant of God and has a beautiful wife and 2 little children. A year ago he was diagnosed with a serious and rare cancer. Since that diagnosis he has been literally, along with his wife and family, fighting for his life. He is in daily pain and distress. His biological family has moved in to help and his church family takes care of all their needs so they can all be together. They are in constant prayer and vigil. Especially now. He is in a really big fight right now. His days and nights are long as he struggles to breathe and sleep. Fear is closing in on him and they are all weary and tired. So, tonight as you count your friends....count the ones you know and see everyday but don't forget the ones that you don't know and may never meet this side of Heaven. Please remember Kelley and Brad in some intense prayers tonight.

I've been tagged by several of you to post the "10 Most Random Things About Me". I've procrastinated doing it because I couldn't remember if it was 10 or 20 so let's just go with 10. Since, I already mentioned the procrastination issues I have, I'll leave that out of the top 10!

10 RANDOM THINGS ABOUT ME ( Trust me, there are more! )

1. I can't stand the inside of the microwave to be dirty.

2. I have absolutely no sense of direction. I could get lost in my own neighborhood.

3. I'm very spontaneous.

4. I always notice people's teeth.

5. I MUST hear a child laugh everyday.

6. I can't hold grudges.

7. I like to have at least one thing on my calendar to look forward to.

8. I think I am a very happy person but yet I deal with depression at times.

9. I love to have parties/ get-togethers/ guests in my home.

10. I possess alot of left over advice that I didn't finish handing out when my kids were growing up. Now, they don't want it. Go figure.

10 1/4. I over plan stuff. WAY WAY WAY overkill.

10 1/2. I can not for the life of me follow simple directions.

10 3/4. I am a multi tasker. I really really think I am undiagnosed ADD.

I have been holding back the news until the OFFICIAL official official notice that I can tell it.

It's now official.

Camp Neena's newest camper that is coming in July is another GIRL! We are so excited. God has made me another perfect and beautiful granddaughter. I can't wait to hold her, snuggle with her, hear her little voice coo and see her beautiful big sister, Jaxon, interact with her. Her cousins are pretty excited too! FUN times are coming. If you want to see her precious little feet on the sonogram you can hop over to her Mommy's blog, Mitch and JD, and you can see for yourself. As for how he knew it was girl from the feet, I'll never know. Teehee. Times are a changing! Seriously.

I HOPE YOU LOVE THIS AS MUCH AS I DID! Beautiful angel baby.

If you live for the next world,
you get this one in the deal;
but if you live only for this world,
you lose them both.

C.S. Lewis

I started to say, "Just a short post....." but I realize that I am probably not capable of just being short with words.

So, thanks to all of you for the following:

1. Wearing RED on Friday. It turned out great here too and I was able to raise a good total for the AHA. The shirts turned out super cute and I don't even know if I got one picture. The city of 'ville proclaimed it GO RED DAY... thanks to my classmate the MAYOR!

2. Wishing me a HAPPY birthday. I have never gotton so many emails. My cup runneth over.

3. Praying for my parents. They are both feeling better and were in church this morning. My sister, Jody, has been here for the weekend and she always perks them up ( and me too! ) . Then baby sis, Kathy is coming later in the week and they will be doing handstands by then. Seriously! My sisters are the light of my life. It seems we never get to really visit. It used to be because we were chasing kids and now when they come we are so busy. I treasure our visits together so much. They love me so unconditionally. Jody made me a wonderful birthday dinner and RED velvet cake today. And, I didn't have to do the dishes! Thanks Ashley and Jody.

4. My children called me all day on my birthday and through the weekend to check on me and the g'parents so that was a great thing to get to hear all their voices. Even though we all talk everyday anyway! I am so so so so blessed by "babies"....grown and not.

5. Thanks to my sweet Tawana and Becky for making sure I had a happy birthday and taking me OUT and making me relax.

6. To Duronda and our precious minister, Chris for stepping in and making sure we had everything we needed and to making my Daddy listen to reason about going to the dr.

I have gotton so many phone calls, emails, cards, and visits from everyone who for some reason are worried about me. Don't. I am fine. It's a privelege to be able to be the head nurse for my parents.

JUST A QUICK UPDATE from days gone by.....

Mom was released from the hospital last week. I left with her not feeling so hot and we both ended up recup'ing at home. I got better. She did not. So, today she is back in the hospital .....same room...same nurses.......same doc. She has been having these nightly episodes where she gets up to go the bathroom and somehow falls enroute back to the bed. So far, all has been fine. But, last night she fell and could not awaken Daddy and spent the night on the floor. This morning when Daddy got up he was looking for her. All is well from that standpoint. Her chest sounded clear, and her UTI seemed to have cleared up. We did discuss the prospect that she might be taking unnecessary medications that could account for her memory lapses. So, the dr.s are re-analyzing her meds to see what she could NOT take. We also want to rule out that she did not have a small stroke. Something is just not right. Vital signs and all are normal and stable which makes us think we are dealing with something else. Hopefully, she'll get a good night's rest! Thanks for your prayers for her. Keep 'em coming.

Also, our son in law Brian's mom, Barbara is not feeling well. A rise in her blood pressure at work today caused her to black out and be rushed to the hospital. She is home now with orders to see her dr. ASAP. Pray for Barbara too!

THANKS.