I AM AN HGTV Addict

OUCH....that hurt. Confession though feels free! I am the queen of too many projects at one time. It stems from late night hours of watching HGTV and all the easy do it yourself project that can be done. These projects can be completed in 1 hour segments while never breaking a sweat and wearing your best khakis. My big strong and virile son came home for 2 days to help me complete "some" of these projects knowing full well his mother was as usual, "biting off more than she could chew".

My intentions are so very good though. My house is my CASTLE and my refuge!

We rented sanders, bought paint, brushes, and drop cloths and started to refinish and stain the deck around the pool. This area is my sanctuary and I felt it needed a face lift. For the first day and a half I pretty much just stayed in the way. ( as usual ) He whirred and sanded and sweated. Occassionally, he shot me a dirty look. I had forgotton what that felt like so I lurked inside watching HGTV. We only had the BIG sander rented for 24 hours and he used it about 12! There were areas that the big thing couldn't get to so the next day we rented a smaller version and he rode that thing around the deck for about 6 hours. I think he remembers now why he left home and went to college to get a degree. Anyway, when he pulled away on Friday evening he was all apologetic that he couldn't stay and finish but I assured him that the hardest part was done and I could complete the rest, NO PROBLEM.

I stayed up late Friday night and by the light of the moon and the porch I started painting little white spindles. I just had to have these CUTE little white spindles around the deck. Saturday morning I'm up and at 'em again painting little white spindles. WHERE ARE MY CHILDREN? WHERE IS THE HIRED HELP? I JUST GOT MY NAILS DONE! My mantra has been to look only 3 spindles ahead and mutter, "Oh, only 3 more to go!" Not letting myself see the other 75,000,000 ahead! I am inside the house now. After 4 hours. I am ready to curl up in a ball. So......left to be done is:

• Touch up ( at least 6 hours worth ) of spindles, railings and dropped paint splatters. Did I mention that I am the messiest and sloppiest painter in the world? I hate to paint. Even Tawana stopped by and took pity on me and joined me in painting for a couple of hours. Friends are wonderful. Then she mentioned something about having to pull out her wisdom teeth with a pair of rusty pliers and running bamboo splinters under her toenails so she had to leave.
• Finish taping around little panes on 2 sets of French door windows to be able to paint doors.
• Paint the steps on both sides of the deck while promising God that I will never start another home improvement project without His blessing and a lot of money in the bank to hire it to be done. OOOOOOH did I say promise? I meant I would pray about it more before I started one.
• WHINE AND MUMBLE really pitifully so that hubby will come out and reach the high parts so I don't have to climb up and down the ladder. Clutch my chest.
• Go back to Home Depot and get more paint for the trim because I ran out. I can not accurately calculate anything. It looked like enough.
• Let it all dry completely for 6 weeks or more.
• Roll the stain over the deck. Let dry 12 more weeks or more.
• Call and beg my son to back again. Have him bring friends. Have him bring the football team. And the baseball team.
• Go to the bank and borrow 5 million dollars to finish this project
• Call my other children and tell them what a wonderful mother I was and why aren't they all here to help me????
• Take the front door down and paint it along with the porch swing. This only took 30 minutes on HGTV.
• Doctor the wasp stings on my ankles from trying to take the porch swing down by myself yesterday . DANG those things hurt.
• Call the travel agency and get on this.
  
  And when we get back I need to start ripping up the carpet in the house so that we can lay new flooring. Anyone got some extra vacation time to spare to give an old lady a hand?

***** Update at 7 PM

Things progressed nicely. Tawana came back and we went to Home Depot and got the extra gallon of paint. We painted and touched up for a couple of hours and called it quits for the day. I am now headed for the shower to see if I can get this paint off me. Hopefully, by Monday I'll be able to roll on the decking stain. Then after that dries.....how long I don't know, I will go to Walmart and buy me some lovely new outdoor furniture. I'll pitch all the "junk" and I'll make HGTV wish they had been in on this multimillion dollar project with $ 1.00 under budget! Pictures to follow.

PANIC MODE

Just when I felt an upcoming panic mode on recent decisions about my future I flipped over my little daily calendar. These words did NOT fall on a deaf heart.

" May you grasp how wide and long and high and deep My love is; a love that surpasses knowledge....you cannot ask or imagine the things I am planning for you." Ephesians 3:16-21

Love,

Your Heavenly Father

How Many Years?

36 years. It's really hard for me to believe it. Especially since my wedding dress is hanging in the closet next to both my daughters dresses. Like I really thought someone else would want to wear it! But, I did at the time. Now, it just hangs there all poofy and yellow just screaming for a round of dress up play. Except I can't play. I think I weighed 89 pounds when I got married. That was a long time and 3 kids ago. So Happy Anniversary to us on May 29th. We still look like a pretty hot couple. Minus a few hairs for one and plus a few pounds for the other. No names mentioned.

All I Said Was.....

All I said was these simple words...........












"Anyone want to dance in the rain with Neena?"

Hand Me a Sparkler

God bless America, Land that I love! Stand beside her and guide her

Thru the night with a light from above;

From the mountains, to the prairies,

To the oceans white with foam,

God bless America,

My home, sweet home.

God Bless Us All! I hope you enjoy your day of freedom. Although, we are all "shackled" with burdens, captive by our own fears, persecuted by our own people for who we are, and see sadness and poverty around us, WE ARE ALL BLESSED to be Americans. I am ashamed somewhat to admit that I am not a potically informed American. I vote. I stand when the flag passes. I get chill bumps when I hear the National Anthemn. I cry at the documentaries when the soldiers come home and it is a happy ending. But, I know that is not always the case. I don't always really take the time to understand the world issues as much as I should. I rely way more on the intelligence and knowlege of people around me for my source of information. I am a military dependent, raised on Air Force bases around the states. I realize the importance of our military troops being trained and ready. I honor those young men and women that leave the security of this land to serve in places that we can NOT even imagine. The fear that must be present in their hearts I can not comprehend. I have not had to ever know what it is like to not live in a free country. I see such ignorance, violence and hatred around me in this world and wonder how long God can face what we have turned this country into. I just pray that my grandchildren will never know anything but freedom. So, whatever your thoughts are on the President and our government and what it's done or hasn't done should not stop you from praying for our leaders everyday. If you don't do it then don't complain about being an American.

Chronicles 7:14: "If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble
themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways;
then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal
their land"

SO.....GOD BLESS AMERICA ..................AGAIN.

My Last School Portrait

I know you are all sick of hearing this. But, trust me you are not as sick of hearing it as I am of thinking it. What in the world am I going to do in 10 days when I turn in my school keys? Those keys have been on my keyring for 30 years. When all my desks are cleaned out and my paper clips neatly in the little organizer who will mess them up? What about all those little secret notes I have stuck everywhere to remind me of things. Who will find those? What if in 25 days they can't find something and I was the last one to have had it? Which I probably was. For the last 30 years, every school morning, I have stood at attention for the Pledge of Allegiance and recited it over the intercom. I have led the National Anthemn and given the morning announcements. How will people know what to do? Of course, I am being totally silly! I know that someone better, more energetic, a fresh new face, and all that will sit in my cushy chair. Her drawers will be clean and she'll be all organized. I know one thing though. It will be years before someone calls her " Office mama" or "Mrs. Office", or "the Mayor", or "Aunt Lynn", or all the other millions of names I gathered over the years. They never were quite sure what I did but they sure thought it was important. I can't walk down the hall without being smothered with kisses and hugs. If I am in the restaurant, grocery store, church, or anywhere in town I have a following of small children. Unconditional love given out by the tons. It just takes seniority for some things.

What a Weekend

To say I was a little giddy about the "surprise" retirement luncheon for me is an understatement. They should know by now that they can NOT successfully pull of a surprise when I am STILL in charge. Fun times, delicious food, wonderful friends and an exquiste beautiful diamond pendant.....were just some of the highlights of my day.

The car was loaded and when the retirement party was over we headed to Houston to watch Princess in her annual dance recital on Saturday afternoon. She is the 3rd from the left ( next to corner of the house ). Actually, the only one doing what she is supposed to be doing. She was waiting for her cue because when they sang DING DONG THE WITCH IS DEAD she tapped her way to the back of the "house" and brought Dorothy the Ruby Slippers so she could get back to Kansas so Auntie Em wouldn't be so worried. Boy, did she do some tapping! Glinda the GOOD WITCH was very proud as were all her fans on Row 25!

There was a lot of loving on Avery too! She was a real trooper and loaded up with us on every turn! She is growing and changing everyday. She watched the recital and was very proud of her cousin!

Macy and I couldn't resist walking down the ocean and getting our feet wet while we were in Galveston. We didn't stay there long because we were only stalling while the restaurant was cooking our SHRIMP!

Then on Sunday we all worshipped God together, sang and filled up about 2 pews! Then that afternoon, JD ( and Mitch too ) were the GUESTs of honor at a baby shower! They received TONS of wonderful gifts that will be waiting for Princess Jaxon when she gets here in a few weeks. My precious friends are wonderful to plan and organize showers and such for our kids. Until you have been the receipent it is hard to explain it but it is much appreciated. My friends and church family have loved JD for only 5 years but they do love her ! She is ONE of us in all ways. They adore her. But, who wouldn't??? She is the daughter in love that I prayed for ...for my son since the day he was born.

After all those festivities we can't forget the birthday celebration of my first born BEAUTIFUL daughter, Heather on Sunday. Nana had a red velvet cake ready for us to share after shower. I could tell you how the day she was born that I have never been the same. I could say how she has made me such a better person...then in 1973 and now all all these years later. I could tell you that I learn things from her all the time. I could tell you what an amazing daughter, sister,granddaughter, wife, mother and friend she is. I could say so many things about her but you wouldn't believe them. You would think I was bragging again. So, I won't go on and on. You wouldn't believe that all those remarkable things could be true about one so young! But at 34 she is all those things and MUCH MORE. It was a very long day. The Sabs had to go home because of school but the rest of us put our jammies on and curled up wherever we could and just loved each other. We passed Avery around and marveled at her every little sound. And today, Monday, we slept in and took the day very slowly.

So this afternoon about 4:30PM , the last car has pulled out of the drive today. The house is strewn with "this and that" from life having inhabited here over the last few days. Beds have been "stripped" and sheets are washing. Towels that have been lying here and there are now washed, folded and put away. The dishwasher is loaded with it's last load of the day. And me? Well, I 'll be ok.

OH POOH

Not everyone loves POOH. But, he is a sweet little bear with a big heart. He speaks with alot of wisdom for a forest animal. Enjoy some of my favorite random POOHisms and see if you don't agree.

“You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes."

“If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together.. there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart.. I'll always be with you.”

“"I wonder what Piglet is doing," thought Pooh. "I wish I were there to be doing it, too."

“When late morning rolls around and you're feeling a bit out of sorts, don't worry; you're probably just a little eleven o'clockish.”

“I don't see much sense in that," said Rabbit. "No," said Pooh humbly, "there isn't. But there was going to be when I began it. It's just that something happened to it along the way."

“Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh," he whispered. "Yes, Piglet?" "Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw, "I just wanted to be sure of you."”

And one of my favorites....... “If you live to be 100, I hope I live to be 100 minus 1 day, so I never have to live without you.”

Didn't that make you smile?

The KING of my Heart

A BOY IS ALL GOD HAS WITH WHICH TO MAKE A MAN

This child makes my heart sing. He makes me smile. To say the years have flown by since he has been "my boy" would be an understatement! This is my first grandchild. I call him Rooster. He was born a "little man". He is one of those unique children that questions everything and must have answers. And not childish answers. He wants the truth and the logic. He has always been very mechanical minded and loves anything with engines and any and ALL sports! He told me one year he wanted to have his birthday party at the HUMMER dealership. Before his feet could reach the pedals he would ride all over our acres on the riding lawn mower just knowing he was driving in the Indy! He would circle the house until he ran out of gas. Then he would push it back to the garage with a little help. Or get one of us to haul the gas can out so he could keep going. No one ever left a driveway that he didn't start their engine. Before he was 2 he always asked everyone he saw to see their car keys. By the time he learned to speak, he knew every make and model of car and truck on the highway and he LOVED diesels and duelies. God blessed me the first three years of his life because he lived within a mile of my house. I saw him daily ....several times a day. Lots of nights I tucked him in bed while his mom and daddy walked. When his daddy got a job in Houston I thought my heart would break but it didn't and it didn't keep me away from being in his life. God had a plan for this little family. There is NOTHING I wouldn't do for him. I mean nothing. He loves to come stay at my house and when he is here he is pretty much the KING. Okay, he is the KING. At Neena's house, there are no rules, bedtimes or food restrictions. I know that is terrible but so far it has worked out great ! He loves trucks, thanks to his Uncle B ! He thought and still does that Uncle B has the coolest truck ever! One time, when he was about 4, I was driving him back to Houston after a visit. At the time we had a running total of how many duelie trucks we saw everyday . He would call me every night to see how many I had seen and tell me how many he saw and we would add them up. I forgot how high we got up to. But on this trip ( 2 hour trip ) he decided that he wanted all the windows on my JEEP rolled down so that we could listen for duelies coming and going while we counted. Now, do you think I would have allowed this with my own children? Absolutely NOT. But, those windows came down and by the time we got to Houston I looked like I had stuck my finger in a light socket. We counted and heard close to 25 duelies on that trip. Once we got on IH 10 we were steady counting! That little 4 year old has grown up to be a BIG 10 year old sports jock. He is a competitive and talented basketball and baseball player. Last summer he came to the 'ville and went to our coaches "TIGER Summer Basketball Camp" and one of the coaches told me he was ready to sign him onto the Varsity squad. He really is an amazing athlete like his daddy ,Uncle Bubs and Uncle B. He loves sports, ESPN, all TRIVIA and he knows it all. He and his daddy go to the ASTRO's games all the time. They even got to go to the World Series last year. He is all boy. He loves gadgets and gizmos. For Christmas he always gives me a LIST of wants. This year he wrote, "gadgets, you know what I like." He also loves to go to GATTILAND where he continuosly hits the jackpot and puts the tickets into his ever growing GATTILAND account. His account is in the thousands because he refuses to buy one of those junkie toys. I wish they would apply it to his college education. He is a loyal LONGHORN fan, a polite, sweet and well mannered little man, an honor roll student, a sweet big brother to LuLu, the loving and oldest cousin to 2 little baby girls, his mommy's love, his daddy's pride, a child of God, and his Neena's 1st clue that the world should go on and on.

Pink Tutus

This beautiful child is mine. I didn't actually birth her but she is my oldest granddaughter. Or as she is commonly known in our family,
little "Princess LuLu". I have called her that since she was a baby and it has stuck. She actually is named after me though!
Those beautiful eyes however are not
something that you usually see in our family though. We are a sea of brown eyes. She takes those eyes after her daddy and Granny Joyce. This weekend our family is going to be VERY BUSY. But, one of the
many highlights is going to Galveston to watch this child dance her little heart out at her annual recital. It is a very big production and a very big DEAL to her.

Our family will take up a whole row ( 10 seats!) and our eyes will be glued to the stage. This is her second year to perform so she is a pro. Last year I got a little teary eyed at one part. OK alot teary eyed! The very beginning of the show the dance instructor came out onto stage and introduced her SENIOR division girls who were all high school age that had been with her since they were "babes". They came out and put on a show that was like off of Broadway. I was blown away. Then the instructor came back out after the roars of applause to tell us how proud she was of the girls and yada yada yada yada.......but she said......" Don't forget that it all started in a pink tutu." The stage curtains opened up and a row of beaming little 4 year olds in pink tutu's balleted out onto the stage. I couldn't stop the tears. THEY WERE ADORABLE. But, you know who was the cutest? After the recital was over she bounded up into my arms and said, "Neena, wasn't I the best?" And of course she was! I didn't even see anyone else on the stage but her.

An Enchanted Childhood

From the second that I drew my first breath, and nine months before, I was destined to become the daughter of one of the most exceptional woman that, quite frankly God ever created. This is a woman who had the gift of laughter that she would give to me. She always carries a gift of humor and the ability to see something humorous or positive in the most negative of situations. She possesses the gift of unconditional and God knew I’d need plenty that. She is a woman of impeccable character. I am still working on that one and don’t see at this stage of my life that I’ll get. Nonetheless, God thought I needed to see that and witness it first hand. She has the most beautiful smile and twinkling eyes that you’ll be hard pressed to find anywhere else on this side of Heaven.

Of all these character traits, first and foremost, my Mother is a Godly woman. I can see her wince now as she reads this. Because, being Godly means being humble and that she is too. Way, way, way humble. I was born on the pew, so to speak, and just assumed that all other children in the world went to church every time the doors were open. I remember laying my head in her lap and hearing her sing. I remember feeling her heartbeat when I would lie very still. I remember how she would scratch my back to keep me still in the assembly. I remember getting pinched and getting my head thumped. I can see her sitting in her chair reading the Bible or snuggled next to me in bed reading from Egenmeir’s Bible Story Book with all the cool pictures of Jesus, Moses, Shadrach, Meshach and Abendego. I remember meeting God through the eyes of my Mother. I still look in her beautiful eyes and see His reflection.

Her inward beauty is also coupled with outward beauty. She grew up a tomboy always looking for a tussle or a fight with her brothers. She loved sports and still does. She wrangled, wrestled, played pranks that curled her poor Mama’s hair! Probably another reason that I love a good joke or healthy prank! She blossomed like a country girl often does and her beauty did not go unnoticed. She soon caught the eye of a handsome Dublin boy at the soda fountain and they fell in love. They taught my sister’s and me about marriage, longevity, stamina, persistence, submission, and basically how to survive as a family when all around you families are crumbling. In June, this marriage will have lived 65 years of “I Love You’’s” , “I’m sorry’s” and “It really was my fault’”. Three daughters witnessed that over the course of years and knew of no other way to enter or stay in a marriage. We didn’t know about screaming and fighting. And yes, we know how blessed we are. My daddy is full of quips daily why he loves Mother so much. Not a day goes by that he doesn’t tell her that he loves her at least 40 times. That is his goal…..40 times. He makes it a point after he has driven her to the edge to make sure she knows that he’ll jump with her! He thinks she is the most beautiful woman in the world and showers her with surprises, both words and gifts. It may have taken him awhile but so what? Remember her gift of patience? He called me the other night to ask if I knew of any beauty pageants for older women because he wanted to enter Mother in one. He has the gift of humor too in case you wondered! Believe me, it is a daily dose of humor in that house.

My mother loved her Mother. This is another story in itself. She took her Mother into her home and cared for her until she was too tired to speak. For 13 years she had no life except being a daughter again. She never knew of any other way. Her patience and love for my grandmother lasted until, at 105, my grandmother went to live with Jesus and wait for the rest of us. Her last words, as she glanced over at my mom, were, “You are my daughter, aren’t you?” And she was, indeed.

Of all the things that my Mother is ……….she is my best friend. She was my first friend in the world. I mean the universe. That fact is no secret to all my other friends and she is their best friend too. When I was small, I remember feeling sorry for all the other children in the world who didn’t have my Mother as theirs. Their mothers all paled in comparison to mine! None were as beautiful, as talented, as smart and as hard working as my mom. She made me always feel beautiful too. When I wore my blue glasses with black speckles for school pictures she framed the 8 X 10. When I had to wear a monstrosity head gear with my braces she thought I looked amazing. Much better than other children looked with the same contraption. She slept with me when I was sick. She brought cool cloths when I had fever or upset stomach. She held my hand when I got a pencillin shot. We moved alot but every home was better then the one before. No matter where the United States Air Force sent us, our home was the best. I was never afraid or insecure. Then I knew what peaceful sleep was. I always knew that my parents were only a scream away. I volunteered my Mother for all kinds of things from cookies to field trips. I still do! She is still the one I want first when anything goes wrong. I need to hear her voice. Not just need but NEED. She understands me better than anyone in the world. She does for me the things that I cannot or will not do for myself. She gives me confidence, support, and security. She lets me fall in her arms when I need her. She prays unendingly for my sisters and me. And, of course, all of our children and grandchildren. Of all the greatest gifts that God has given me, one that I will always cherish, is that I still sit beside my Mother on the pew. I still hear her beautiful voice lifted up in praise. I still hold her hand when we pray. I know the feel of the pages of her Bible and all the little notes stuffed inside. I know the pictures that she has tucked in all the pockets. I can still reach down for her purse, like I did when I was a child, and get a piece of gum and see what she has new in there. I can reach over and lay my arm in her lap and she’ll still scratch it. If I get antsy and fidgety (because I still do) she still thumps my head.

I learned how to be a Mother from my Mother. The greatest blessing of all. I learned how to laugh, how to joke, how to forgive, how to believe, how to sing, how to pray, how to be a friend, how to be fair, how if I don’t have something nice to say to not say anything, and how to love. And proudly, I learned I am a pretty good head thumper too.

So, Helen Naomi, with one L……Mother, Mom, Mama, and Nana…..I love you with all my heart. I thank God everyday that you are my Mother. To the moon and back……infinity…….forever. Thanks for a most enchanted childhood that still continues everyday of my life.

BEFORE and AFTER

BEFORE

copied but adapted

author unknown

Before I was a Mom... I slept as late as I wanted and never worried about how late I got into bed. I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday. Before I was a Mom... I cleaned my house each day. I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby. I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous. I never thought about immunizations. Before I was a Mom... I had never been puked on. Pooped on. Spit on. Chewed on. Peed on. I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts. I slept all night. Before I was a Mom... I never held down a screaming child so that doctors could do tests. Or give shots. I never looked into teary eyes and cried. I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep. Before I was a Mom... I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down. I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt. I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much. I never knew that I could love someone so much. I never knew I would love being a Mom. Before I was a Mom... I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body. I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby. I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child. I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.
Before I was a Mom... I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay. I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom. I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom. And before I was a Neena... I didn't know that all those feelings would be tripled to the moon and back!

The REAL ME..A Self Portrait

I am a self professed procrastinator. I put things off until way past the last minute. Procrastinators always volunteer for special projects and jobs for other people. I don't know why I do that but I have noticed that the older I get the worse it seems to get. It seems like we think we can redeem ourselves by accomplishing things for other people! I love to plan parties and big extravaganzas. I always get involved in weddings and celebrations. Mainly because I love to decorate ! Procrastinators have to make lists. We must have them to survive. Sometimes I have the same list going in several places at once because procrastinators seem to misplace things easily. Sadly, alot of these things on my list don't get accomplished. That is very unsettling for a procrastinator. Especially when coupled with that disorder, you throw in a kick of perfectionism. Not traits that compliment each other! But, when I do get moving on things.....projects, "to do's", housecleaning, there is NO stopping me. I am full speed ahead and it sometimes lasts for days. Things are "flying" in all directions and I feel POWER...I start checking things off like crazy. It is incredible...... I just wish it happened more often!

Ever Have One of These Days?

Let's All Move

This is where I want to live. In Happy.

Isn't that a wonderful place? I wonder what the population is and if they have a Target? Do people have to work in Happy? Can grouchy people live in Happy? I bet you have to take an entrance exam to be a citizen of this town. There has been some drama at school this week as there always seems to be at the end of a school year. I think I am going to suggest that our entire campus transfers to Happy ISD.

Anyone else want to go?

Puppy Breath

Ok......I admit it. I have puppy fever. Several years ago we lost our beloved dog that had been part of our family for almost 17 years. It broke my heart and the rest of us too! We said NEVER AGAIN! We get too attached. All of a sudden though, I am having this maternal longing for a puppy. I want to smell it's breath and have it fall asleep beside me. I want to housebreak it and have it chew up all my shoes....oh wait a minute. I changed my mind.

Early Risers

When I stepped out the back door with my cup of coffee this morning, I thought I would be the only one up and out. But, I had nosy neighbors. It looks like they are wondering what I am doing there! Almost like they are whispering to each other! I think the heifer on the left is the one I watched being born through binoculars some months back! Oh, the entertainment I have. Who says you have to spend money on entertainment?

LIZARD LOVE

Spring love does not recognize differences. I walked out the front door today and saw this little visitor. I had seen him before lots of times. He hides in my flower pots and around the porch. He usually scurries away when I come out the door. But today, he was not intimidated by me in the least. I made several pictures of him from all angles. Somewhere in the middle of our photo shoot, he fell in love with me. It "ain't" easy being green, I tell ya. WELCOME SPRING lovers wherever or whoever you are!

Wake Me When It's Over

It's amazing the peace I've felt since my letter
of retirement hit the superintendent's desk.
I saw him today and he asked me if I had
any regrets. I said ABSOLUTELY NOT.
I knew. Don't ask me how but I just knew.
God's hand was in it. This is for sure.
As of June 8th..........I'm free from anything
normal. My trust is in Him. I just don't want to think about it. Until it's over. Is it over yet?


"The Spirit of God will not lead a man where the grace of God cannot keep him.”
— Author Unknown

Everyone Needs a Conscience

This woman is without a doubt the other side of my soul. She has taken me broken, spent, and hopeless and made me see worth in myself and the world around me. She is the other voice in our trio. I am not trying to sound boastful, but Becky, Tawana and I have been so entwined through our journey into this part of our lives that when we sing, our harmony is unique. Sometimes we start singing and can't stop. Sometimes we just need to sing to feel complete and calm . Then we meet somewhere or take a car trip around town or sit on someone's porch and SING. We don't care who hears! We have many years of memories of going to the beach together every summer and there we would sing our hearts out on the balcony overlooking the ocean and God's glory. It was then, while at the beach, that there was nothing that could be negative in our lives. Four of us traveled there every summer. After one our group died from breast cancer we haven't been back since. But, we are going to. It is Tawana's favorite place in the world.....the beach. She loves the beach, pumpkins, fall, holidays, traveling, and laughing! She has the best laugh in the world!

Each of us has talents that are particular or peculiar. But, we share a deep connection with each other. We have grown up together, raised our children together, in some instances saved our marriages together, and are daily praying for each other and trying to encourage each other into Heaven.

But, Tawana. She is our leader. She is our strength and our teacher. She knows the right words, the right verses, and knows what key we need to be in whether in be on pages of our music or pages of our lives. She has saved me so many times. She is one of those gifted people that literally can do anything. She is a decorator, a scholar, a Bible teacher, a teacher, a mentor, a mother, and a friend. She is a carpenter, a plumber, a gardener, a "pick up a task and run with it" kind of person. She is beautiful on the outside and the inside. She glows. She is a minister to others, an organizer superior, a chef, a Mimi. When my children were small ( and even now ) if something can't be fixed, figured out or finished, their first words were, "Mom, just call Tawana." Even my parents echo, "There is nothing that Tawana can't do." And that is the truth.

There have been so many times when I have been hurting or needed someone to talk to and it seems I can't get to her side quick enough. There I am consoled and encouraged. She always knows what to say or what to do. I can truly say that she is my conscience. I have to always know that she believes in me. She is truly one of the greatest gifts of my life. One of the wonderful things about the friendship that we three girls share is that we know how much we need each other.

And, I'm not saying all this because it is almost her birthday. But, it is. Almost her birthday. In fact, it is her birthday on May 5th. Which is coming up very soon. Happy Birthday Tewiki and MANY MANY MANY more.

Joy Wherever She Goes

Not everyone can coax and smile and a laugh just by giving someone a hug. But, this girl can. You are never feeling bad for very long when Becky comes in a room. She is without a doubt the most wonderful friend. First and foremost though she is a child of God. She is quick to note that. She really doesn't have to say it because she lives it. Wherever she is. Young and old respect her and love her. She is a friend that you can ( and I have ) call in the middle of the night. We have been through alot together. If I had to ever say anything negative about Becky it would be that she is WAY TOO HARD on herself. She never says a cruel word, she has a very succesfull career, she still loves and supports her 3 grown children and 5 grandchildren. She loves her life now. She is free from abuse and hurt. During those years she stayed close to God and fed on the words of the Bible. God prepared her for this next portion of her life . No doubt about it. Which is what got her to this remarkable place in her life. She serves God at Rest Home services each Sunday and greets/hugs/kisses every resident. They look for her. They love her. I do too.....You'd be hard pressed to ever find someone to say a bad word about my best friend. Then you'd have to cross me too.

This pretty much describes me today! I go back to work tomorrow after a week's absence. Although, I am looking forward to getting back to my friends, I am not looking forward to going back and seeing the workload left on my desk. The upside to all this is I realize that this job will go on when I don't! Retirement is close. I have tried several times to count the days but so far have not. I don't really want to know how close it is. Someone else has been hired to take my place and I anticipate meeting her sometime this week. I am glad I was out of the office when they hired her. Giving up this job is like giving away puppies. You want it to go to someone who will love it like you did. I am a creature of habit. I never liked change. I like to go the same familiar places, with the same familiar people, in the same familiar town, and surround myself with the same familiar friends. Right now though, I am feeling rather needy because I know all that is fixing to change. I have seen it happen when others leave their jobs. It is not the same when you call or when you stop by and visit. My world is going to be totally different from the one I've been in for X amount of years. I am going to have to establish some goals and find some projects or volunteer work. I am not a sitter. I do plan to spend alot more time with family, that' s true. Let's face it though, I don't believe they want to wake up every morning with me on the porch with their morning paper and a smile! I realize that I am going to have all this time to do all the things I want to do. Things just for me! Funny thing though, I don't remember what they were.

Let Your Hands Be Busy

I normally do not embrace manual labor. However, today the littlest princess in the family drove away and I begged my Daddy to let me help him weed his flower beds. Call it what you will. The next few days will call for lots of busy work. Idle hands.....you know what they say!

DOES ANYONE HAVE THE TIME?

In my home I have a large antique clock that hangs over my mantle and chimes on the hour and the half hour. But, I have not been home now for 5 days and in 5 days I have had absolutlely no idea what time it is. But, it doesn't matter. I have not needed to know. Things around here are on supply and demand. We sleep when we want and eat when we want. I wrote a check at the grocery store today and was very suprised to learn that it is indeed Wednesday, April 18th. I am not looking forward to going home. Back to a schedule, clocks, and no naps. And certainly no little soft kisses from the pinkest little lips you have ever seen.

I WARNED YOU.....

I warned you.........isn't she beautiful????? She adds # 3 to my beautiful grandchildren.

I wasn't the only one excited! Reid and Macy were thrilled to meet their new cousin. I am not getting much rest ! But who cares!!!!!! There is no better nap than this.

As if my blessings don't already abound I have one more coming in June! Another girl. And I can barely wait to meet her. I am about to decide that I really am going to like this retirement stuff!

God Blesses Me Again...and again...again

I've been in Houston since Friday to be a part of the birth of my 3rd grandchild......AVERY NAOMI. And,please forgive the bragging but OMG....she is abosolutely beautiful. 7 lbs. 12 oz and 21 inches long. This day has long been prayed for and waited for ..... believe me...if you have read much of this story our Avery is a miracle. Today Ashley and BA came home with arms full and happy hearts. I wish I had pictures to share tonight. Don't get me wrong I have some. Over 100 but I am not home to load them or upload them or whatever it is you do. If Ashley is feeling better tomorrow we may try. Hopefully, I will figure that out before the week is up. I plan to stay in Houston for the week and rock this beautiful child while her mother gets some much needed rest. The last few weeks have been quite an ordeal. My "son in love's" father passed away on Good Friday. His services were Thursday the 12th and Avery was born on her late grandfather's birthday Friday the 13th. From henceforth more named the LUCKIEST DAY IN THE WORLD.

Safe

Sometimes my restlessness catches up with me and I crumble. It takes alot to make it happen but it eventually does. Here are the latest top 10 events to send me running to my Saviour's arms today:
1. A new precious granddaughter to be born any minute. She is no longer Possum but has a real name that shall remain sealed behind my quivering lips.

2. Are you sure I really said I was going to retire? Now, what am I going to do?

3. My expectant daughter is grieving tonight over the death of her father in law 3 days ago. His services are tomorrow in San Antonio. I will be driving there for the service. She is home alone in Houston while hubby is in SA with his family and wanting to be with her too. Too many entanglements.

4. DID YOU HEAR ME????? I WILL BE DRIVING IN SAN ANTONIO. I do not know San Antonio. Nor do I know where I am going. Someone told me that if I get to the Alamo then I went too far. Thanks for the advice.

5. I never never never cry. My mother doesn't cry. She can't remember when the last time was that she cried. We thought it was defective tearducts or hormones run amok. But, tonight mine opened and the tears won't stop.

6. I am supposed to be meeting with a retirement advisor with any questions that I might have for this most final decision I have made. How the heck do I know what questions to ask. I just know that I did not plan very well for my retirement years financially. I did not realize they would get here so quick. So, if you see a sweet, new little lady greeting at Walmart just shake my hand and walk quickly by. Don't act like you know me.

7. My mother's head wound last week , that required 46 stitches, is healing very nicely. That was another ordeal that ended positively. She almost got a forehead lift and looks younger than I do.

8. I just changed insurance policies for both cars and the house. I had to make double payments this month. You gotta love small town banking when they call you and are whispering to hurry and get some money in your account. And you do.

9. My precious daughter-in-love who is also pregnant is awaiting her glucose test and worrying about the results. There is too much to worry about. But, I think she mostly worries about being married to my son who worries about too much like his mother. God bless her.

AND 10. When am I going to realize that I can not answer all the problems of the world? When am I going to believe that God feeds the sparrows? When am I going to believe that I really can run into the arms of my God for refuge? Maybe now. Believe me, I am weary.

He Is Your Guy

In a world where no one can count on anyone to be honest and get a job done, this is your guy. He is dependable. He works cheap. He is a laugh a minute. He sings while he works. If he can find dependable transportation he is there when he says. He works long hours. He is a light eater but does pause for anything Mickey Mouse.

This is my great nephew. And yes, I think he is the cutest thing ever. He has been partnering with his dad and a bunch of others in their own version of EXTREME HOME MAKEOVER. His mommy is very sick in the hospital and has been there now for 2 months. During her hospitalization her sweet hubby found a house that he thought she would like. So, digital pictures and contracts started flying back and forth. Soon, it was a done deal. But, there was quite a bit of work to be done. So, now paint swatches, carpet samples, knobs, granite, and bathroom fixtures are being drug through the hospital for approval. She has some wonderful girlfriends who she is trusting with details that she can't be there for. Not to mention the most wonderful mom/dad and in-laws to help. Hoardes of friends show up nightly and work is ongoing in every single room. I hear it is already a show place. Her family and friends want her to be able to come home and sit down and not have to do anything. Even the unpacking will be done. It is very possible that she will be hospitalized for the duration of her pregnancy. Now she is only 23 weeks, I believe. She is expecting a little brother who will also sign on to this crew. Please please please remember this remarkable Christian family in your prayers. Storm the gates of Heaven for her speedy recovery and a healthy baby. They are always the "givers" so it is hard for them to be on the "receiver" end, but it just shows how much they are loved and respected. I am proud to be their auntie~

FEAR TAKETH OVER

First let me say, I DO NOT LIKE TO GO THE DENTIST. However, I think good teeth are essential. It is one of the first things that I notice about a person. I think your teeth tell alot about you. I know successful people that have the nastiest, yellowist, rotten and gross teeth and they just go through like nothing is wrong. My parents spent some good money on my teeth. I should have realized I would have to keep it up to keep 'em good. I made sure my children alwasy had their regular check ups, cleanings and we did the braces things for all three of them. Teeth are important. Just ask a horse. But, I don't like the dentist office and it's smells, it's weird utensils, the long needles ( have you ever looked?) and the fact that my mouth has to hang open and drool . So, uncouth. I do not like the dental theory. But, I like my dentist. Now, that I have that out of the way you will be suprised to know that I did, indeed, go to the dentist today. It had been put off longer than I thought. According to their records it was in this decade but still longer than I should have waited. I meant to. I really meant to go alot. I meant to call and make an appointment almost every month. But, something always got in the way. Like having some other hideous procedure. Or, banging my head against brick wall, or sticking bamboo splinters under my fingernails, or having my eyebrows waxed. Any excuse to not follow through and go.

You are probably thinking, "Oh girl, put your big girls on and go." Certainly after all I have been through a trip to the dentist shouldn't be frightful. To top it off, I have a wonderful and compassionate dentist who is so high tech and dental savvy I have nothing to ever worry about. So, today I went. I kept my appointment and I am very proud of myself. I am not sure why I am proud because I don't have a clue what went on. They strapped me on to the nitrous oxide machine and for 2 hours I didn't hear drilling, feel needles, or smell that gross tooth grinding smell. That nitrous is some good stuff. It was a wonderful ethereal and relaxing visit. I couldn't believe it was over. Until I wrote my check. Then I remembered why I was scared of the dentist. IT COSTS TOO MUCH.. they need to give your nitrous at the check out desk. $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Everyone Needs A Sallie

Some things just make me happy. My Sallie is one of those "things". She is a character as you can tell my the pictures. There are about 8 of us from our local congregation that hold Sunday morning Bible class at the local retirement home. When I volunteered to participate little did I know the joy and the happiness I would soon find. It's been over 2 years now that we have gone. Like "clockwork" we are there every Sunday at 9:30 AM. They are watching and waiting for us. They are up, dressed, and "wheeling" themselves, or being wheeled by one of us to come to Sunday School. Sallie usually seeks me out but we can't always sit together because I get tickled or she gets tickled. The world is a playground to Sallie. She walks around, pretty much unmonitored, but comfortable in her surroundings. She carries around an unlit cigarette. She doesn't mind it isn't lit. She "pretends". She whispers things in my ear that to her are all too clear and vivid. I know though that those things never happened. She imagines to see people. Oh there are some really good stories about Sallie. Some you wouldn't believe. She is my partner though. I look forward to seeing her everyweek. The only negative thing about this ministry that I have been able to find is that almost each week we come to find that someone has passed away. It is so sad for us. We have gotton to know them so well. I still look for one friend I called MamMaw and I still miss holding her hand during service. I know I'll miss Sallie. I hope God keeps her around here for a long time.

IT IS OFFICIAL

What started out as an I might turned into a great big IT'S TOO LATE NOW. I officially turned in my intent of retirement effective June 10th. I plan on being done and closed out before that though. I couldn't be any more excited or scared. I spoke yesterday with my principal and we had a good talk. Then when I got home last night I emailed my "office matey" because I knew I couldn't talk to her without crying. We have worked together side by side for over 20 years. When I got to work this morning I had an email from her. So, we emailed all morning because we both agreed we'd cry if we talked about it. Then around lunch, I went over to the superintendent's office and told him. He was suprised but very understanding. I came back to the office and wrote a personal letter to each of the staff who have been my "family" for 30 years. They began flooding in all afternoon and there has been alot of shock and tears. But, it is done. No turning back.

I mentioned in my letter that I had been getting gentle heavenly nudges for some time now. Not really ignoring them and very aware of where they were coming from. It is like a light just came on and I said, ENOUGH. There are too many things I want to do. Right now I am young and healthy enough to do whatever I want. I even know what that is.........I want to wake up and think, "Hmmmm what do I want to do today?" I want to throw a suitcase in the car and head to Abilene or Houston to rock one of 4 babies. I want to sit with my mom and dad on the porch and drink iced tea. I want to pack up and go stay with my sisters and shop, and eat, and shop. I am going to rest and rest and rest. I am going to get my house in order and my health. I am going to clean out closets and cabinets. If I want. I want to volunteer to do things I like to do. I want to take lots of pictures. I want to take some road trips to visit friends who have moved away. I might even take an airplane flight all by myself !

When I started to work 30 years ago I was 25 years old with 2 precious little girls. Soon after a son was born. Since that day my life has been full of changes and responsibilities that I wouldn't trade for anything. I have been in fast mode and never looked back. All I know is that in the fall when the school bus runs by my house I won't panic and think I'm late. I'll just pour myself another cup of coffee and put in a good movie.

It's In the Water

All of these beautiful young women are somehow part of my flesh and blood....and if not flesh and blood then they are part of my soul by having married some of my flesh and blood. Got it? I claim them all and love them all dearly. This is but a small group of the immediate family cousins that gathered at my home over Christmas. They are a special group.....chosen for this pictures because they are all pregnant just weeks apart from each other. It has been so fun to watch them each change and grow. For 2 of them it is their second time around but for the other 3 , my daughter, daughter in law, and niece namesake included , it is a first. To say we are excited is an understatement. The first place prize went out to Hollie and Justin for the first arrival of this group of 5. Brooks came in February and is absolutely beautiful. So, one down. Four to go. There have been a few scary moments along the way. One of these precious "moms" has been very sick and is spending her 2nd time in the hospital since this picture was taken. She spent almost the entire month of February there and wasn't home long before she was back. And there she remains. She has a pregnancy related condition called, hyperemesis. She is very, very sick and in alot of pain. We are so worried. Please remember her in your prayers everytime you approach the "throne of God". So far the baby is doing great and seems to be growing and for that we are so thankful. We have got to Christine well so that she can enjoy this wonder of pregnancy and enjoy her husband and little son that need her too! I know that worries her because she feels so helpless. She is a very courageous young woman. Everyone around her is pitching in and helping........Then Jenna Lynn....we are waiting any minute to get a call from her that she is headed to the hospital. We were hoping our newest little girl would come last week for SPRING BREAK but she had other ideas......so we still wait. Then next is my Ashley. We are ecstatically happy about this birth. It is a big healthy girl and she is due to arrive around the end of April if not sooner. If you have read my blog then you know the miraculous journey she and B have been on to become parents. Then my little precious , DIL , J.D. is giving me another granddaugher the end of June. I am counting the days for school to be out so I can go rock baby Jaxon. It's going to be a very busy next few months. Please pray for my family and all my little mommies. We will be forever grateful!

Red High Heels and Gameboys

I spent a wonderful spring break doing the things I love the best. Being with my children and grandchildren. A trip to Houston to ready the nursery of our much anticipated Possum in a few weeks then it was on to Abilene to get Jaxon's room ready for her in June. We got a great start on the room....painted the walls, the cribs together, and some other basic plans in action. I have so so much to look forward to. The kids decided to let mom return to Houston and spend the week with Neena. It was like wonderland. We played Disney Yahtzee by our own made up rules. Macy ran an Easter Egg store in the front room. After watching a morning of CMT and seeing Kellie Pickler's RED HIGH HEEL song she wore my red heels the rest of the week. She knows all the words too! She was mostly worried about why Kellie pushed that boy in the video. I "bought" lots of plastic eggs for a million dollars but she always gave me a receipt in her own 4 year old handwriting. Reid stayed nestled between GAMEBOY and Playstation 2 and no one told him to go to bed or take a shower. Okay, on day 3 I did ask him to take a shower. Macy and I put on makeup together every morning. We talked about when she grew up Neena would buy her some makeup of her own. Two make up mirrors side by side every morning. We played outside, shot some hoops, visited Nana and Poppi, went to the rec center, watched movies, went to Walmart and visited friends they've made in the 'ville. I made pancakes from scratch, "nutrious" suppers with bomb pops for dessert. Even more than one if you wanted it. We ate whatever we wanted whenever we wanted. We caught doodle bugs and put them in plastic containers and punched holes in the lids. We snuggled alot. We had no schedules. We stayed up late and slept late. Then, of all things.......their mother made them go home. I was sad. I still am. It's too quiet in this house. I need some more Easter Eggs from the Easter Egg store and those heels just don't look right on me anymore.